2020, This Podcast, and the Future

Hi heathens. It’s December of 2020 right now and we’re collectively limping toward the end of what has been a pretty brutal year. Looking back, part of me feels a twinge of regret that I didn’t give more of myself to this podcast and just really take advantage of the opportunities quarantine and shutdown have provided for introverted makers and creators like myself. I can see a version of this year where Karyn and I churned out dozens of new episodes and grew our little family of listeners and met a whole host of new guests, and yeah… part of me wishes those things had happened. They didn’t, of course, and if you’re a regular listener of Heathen, you know we’ve had a pretty scattershot season with, to put it non-judgmentally, an inconsistent release schedule. 

I feel like regret is a profoundly useless state of mind, so while I can acknowledge the missed opportunities, and even offer an apology to those of you who really do love these conversations and would have liked to had more of them during this weird, terrible year we’ve all had, I’m not here to lament these things. Instead, I’m choosing to see the ways this year has prepared Heathen for our next chapter. In January, Karyn and I (along with our partners) became housemates, which, of course, changed our dynamic. There’s much more to navigate in a friendship and entrepreneurial relationship when you share kitchen space. Then the virus happened, and the four of us suddenly found ourselves shut in with each other, figuring out how to navigate lost income, two new marriages, a dog and cats that don’t get along, unexpected deaths in the family, and more. Our new common workspace became the hub for a host of virtual productions. One of the big reasons we moved into this house was for the large room with the giant fireplace that we painted pink where we planned to host book groups, house concerts, recording sessions, and more. Instead, it has transformed into our virtual video studio, beaming church services and Heathen Happy Hours and online concerts and live podcast shows out into the world multiple times each week since March.

Our 2020 Quaranteam.

Like all of you, we’ve navigated the unsettling uncertainty with as much courage as we could muster, making what we could and showing up in ways that our bodies allowed. Our Thursday night Heathen Happy Hour show has become our primary haven for a core group of folks, isolated around the globe, but together in a Facebook chat box every week where we sing a mix of lovely and ridiculous cover songs (and, for Hans, a smattering of originals) and talk ourselves through another week in this unending groundhog day loop. We’ve only missed one Thursday, and that was just to let Karyn and Ben get married in another virtual event that was the worldwide wedding phenomenon we all needed in 2020. 

This year has seen Karyn publish two beautiful books of poetry, release several new songs with her partner through their duo project Story and Tune, launch new branches to her freelance business, and develop some really incredible projects currently in the works that you’ll be hearing about soon. For my part, I’ve been learning how to be a husband in a pandemic and—I think we can say, successfully navigating that first year of marriage, although you may want to confirm that with my husband;  I’m somehow still miraculously employed by a regional theatre whose stages have been dark since March, and I’ve gone from dabbling with the art of drag performance to creating a full-fledged character named Flamy Grant, to whom I will soon be passing the torch of hosting duty here at Heathen. A podcast co-hosted by a drag queen just sounds so much more fun, doesn’t it? 

Speaking of Flamy, she won’t be the only “new” host here. We’re bringing on two past Heathen guests to be full time hosts, and we can’t wait to re-introduce you to these fantastic humans—and to pass along to them 50% of the work that goes into making a podcast. :) More on that development very soon.

For now, I just want to acknowledge what a very hard year it’s been. I would have loved to give you more episodes this year; instead I gave you a bunch of selfies chronicling my drag journey and I showed up every Thursday night dressed up to sing and banter with varying degrees of preparedness. I’m okay with that. I’m grateful for it, and even proud of it. I hope you are okay with yourself this year too. I think of you often, and I miss the visceral and emotional documentation of my own spiritual journey through the conversations we have here. I’m very much looking forward to getting back into it, with a larger team, an exciting round of new guests, and a few more tricks up our sleeves.

Before we do though, we have one more episode to share with you. We recorded this conversation with Tess Meissner in July… of 2019. Here’s one thing I do unabashedly regret: not getting this to you sooner. I won’t bore you with the excruciating detail of how and why this episode was lost and then finally found, but I am so glad that it’s finally in your earholes. This is quite possibly one of the most “out there” conversations we’ve ever had while simultaneously being one of the most deeply moving and, for me, personally transformational, experiences on this podcast. On her first visit to Heathen, Tess took us on a shamanic drum journey to meet our power animals. Here, she introduces us to the fourth density and a social memory complex named Ra whose Rule of One is transmitted through people called the Wanderers… or, more succinctly, as Tess put it: “aliens, bro.” I adore Tess with my whole damn being and I’m so glad to bring her back to you, even if it’s a year and half after I intended to. 

One last thing: if, like me, you can’t get enough of what Tess is laying down, you’re in luck. As a hypnotherapist, Tess helps folks heal and grow in a variety of ways, one of which is through past life regression sessions. We were fortunate to be able to record one of these with Tess, and you can experience it yourself and go on your own past life regression through this recording. There is a teeny, tiny catch: for right now, we’re only making this recording available to our supporters on Patreon. I know, what a cruel trick, right? But hey… we are doubling our hosting staff here and as Karyn likes to sing… “Podcasts cost money…” You can join for as little as $3/ month and get access to this episode and other Patreon exclusives at www.Patreon.com/HeathenPodcast.

Thank you so much for listening to this show. I really do think of you all often, and I’m excited to get back to the beauty of these spiritual conversations for the godless. I wish you the happiest of holidays that can be had and if you need a reason to smile or some heathens to drink with, join us on the Heathen Facebook page at 7pm Pacific every Thursday night. In a year of isolation and loss, it’s one way we’re trying to help all of us feel less alone and more alive. We love you, heathens.

-Matthew Blake